Being fully in vacation mode, relaxing in my backyard, enjoying a cold drink and soaking up sun rays, I was totally unaware I had received several messages from friend and fellow photographer Simon Sutcliffe. I read the text that said "Doing a photoshoot with model. Would like to try direct flash. Looking for wingman. Open to further suggestions. Let me know if you're interested". As the previous photoshoot was so much fun and using flash is something I'm trying to get more experience with, I was totally game. I packed my gear, charged the batteries and jumped on my bike and rode to the hotel where the photoshoot was going to take place.
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After losing my wife at the end of last year (see blog post Eveline), I stopped writing blogs and put photography on hold for a while. After a certain period of time I started shooting again, not always with the same passion as before and sometimes even with some reluctance. But photography helped me to keep my mind busy with other more positive things. Slowly but surely I was shooting more and more and now I'm even thinking about doing some new photography related projects again. One of the projects that has already come on my way, is a photo shoot with (amateur) models. This was a first for me, as I normally shoot landscapes, my dog Nikki, company events and occasionally a headshot for work. With several colleagues I went to the old city centre of Amersfoort to shoot some pictures at sunset.
On the 23rd of November 2016 I lost my wife Eveline. She was only 47 years young. For more than 20 years she battled with Chronic Fatigue Syndrome. A decease with an unknown cause, for which there is no cure. It causes extreme fatigue, depressions, anxiety disorders and other ailments. Every day was a struggle for her. Even more so in the last few months of her life. The thought of the decease becoming worse and worse and almost certainly making her completely bedridden was too much for her. She decided it was enough. After she did her best to prepare me and her family for what was to come, she ended her life. She took some pills, fell asleep and didn't wakeup anymore. Leaving a beautifully written letter behind, telling me and her family we were not to blame, in the contrary. Even though I'm completely devastated, I fully understand why she did it and I also believe it was a brave decision to make. Eveline was the most beautiful human being I have ever met and she made my life so much more better than it was. She had a great sense of humor, was always ready to help me and others around her, was very concerned with animal welfare and had a great talent for writing short stories. She also wrote a beautiful book about our dog Sammy (who past away in 2015) and her struggle with CFS. She was very strong, but also very vulnerable.
Every day, even more so when I look at photos and videos of her, I feel the enormous pain of what I've lost. But I also feel very privileged that I had her in my life. She made me a better person and I feel good that I was there for her whenever she needed me and she was there for me. As a tribute to her life I want to share some my favorite pictures of her. Recently I bought the Zhongyi lens turbo II M42 to M43 adapter. Later more about my experience with this adapter, first an explanation why I bought the Zhongyi. The Zhongyi lens turbo adapter costs 149 USD (that was about 130 euros with the exchange rate at the time I bought it). It is certainly not the cheapest lens turbo adapter you can buy. You can even buy ones that are around 80 USD. But those are not well made and have lenses inside them that are not very sharp. The Zhongyi is quite a bit cheaper than the better known Metabones Speedbooster (which is about 3 times more expensive). But I've read that the Zhongyi holds up quite well against its better known and more expensive counterpart in the results it produces.
After weeks and weeks of longing for my summer vacation, it was finally there. In the last week of August I started my 4 weeks of rest and enjoyment with all the free time I could wish for. One week at home, getting work related thoughts out of my head, focussing on relaxing, making long walks with Nikki and looking forward to and preparing for our trip to Italy. In week 2 we drove to Moniga del Garda, a small town at Lago di Garda, Italy.
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September 2023
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